Selfish Living or Selfless Living?

So, I sit here looking at this blank empty space in which I can only begin to scratch the surface on something I want to talk about.  In recent days, and even weeks, God has been trying to give me a message. (not that He doesn't usually... but this is something big) However, me being the imperfect selfish human that I am, have not been listening.  Praise the Lord for Jesus and His forgiveness!

So, I just really feel like in several circumstances God has been really trying to shine through and show me His will; however, I have not been paying attention as well as ignoring Him.  As sad as that is... it is the truth.  I have been completely living with thoughts of what I want, what I want to accomplish, and MY plans.

HELLO!  I AM SO WRONG!  God, woke me up to this last night.  As I was prayerfully considering some possibilities of some stuff I have been dealing with in my personal life, I was just like God, this is ridiculous.  I have not been listening to You.  I prayed that He would use the Holy Spirit to show me what He wanted me to see.  After flipping through the concordance of my Bible for a while, I began getting frustrated.  I was like God, I want You, so show Yourself to Me.  You know what they say, "Be careful what you ask for."  Because man did he ever show Himself, and man did He step on my toes.  As I was sitting there discouraged... I looked over at my book shelf.  I saw my green book that my mom gave me for Christmas.  It is a copy of My Utmost for His Highest.  I have been trying to do the reading in it... however in past days it wasn't going so swell.  But, it is amazing how on a day to day basis it seems like whatever the text is... it usually fits... and it usually challenges me BIG time.  Well, yesterday's was no exception.

It's titled: Look Again and Think

After looking at the verse... I knew.  I knew I was in the presence of God.  

"Do not worry about your life... " Matthew 6:25

That's all He had to say.  I think my mouth hit the floor.  So, needless to say... I dived deep into the short devotional to see what God had in store.  Here is just a snippet of what the text contained... just a bit of what God told me.

"I say to you... do not worry about your life."  Our Lord says to be careful only about one thing - our relationship to HIM. But our common sense shouts loudly and says, "That is absurd, I must worry about my life" ... Jesus says you must not. Beware of allowing yourself to think that He says this while not understanding your circumstances.  Jesus Christ knows our circumstances better than we do, and He says we must not think about these things to the point where they become the primary concern of our life.  Whenever there are competing concerns in your life, be sure you always put your relationship to God first."

Again, I say I was floored.  I cried out to God for forgiveness.  I was like God, you know I haven't been living this way.  Help me to focus on the face of Jesus.  He is all I need.  

I always seem to do this.  I always seem to worry about circumstances.  God is bigger than circumstances.  Someone wise (my mom) once told me that worrying is calculating without God.  No matter the situation... whether it is about this or that or anything... none of it is worth an ounce of worry.  Jesus can take it away.  So, I prayed that God would take care of my worries that I had for today, and that I would not think about them and let them take priority over Him.  You know what?  God is faithful... He has truly shown Himself greatly to me today.  He allowed me to deal with the situation(s) very well.  I could have done none of it without HIM.... He is amazing.  I just can't wait for the day that I can physically and spiritually sit at the foot of the Great Throne and Praise HIM!  He is the WONDERFUL COUNSELOR and PROVIDER!  I am reminded of these lyrics, "Once I again I look upon the cross where He died, I am humbled my His mercy, and I'm broken inside.  Once again I pour out my life."

My I truly do that.  God has shown Himself to me.  He has also shown me a bit of His will and a little bit more of His Glory.  May all that I am be all His.  I am all His.  May I be selfless... not selfish.  God, continue to show me, You.  Continue to bring the praise upon Yourself.  May You be glorified.  Show me Your will.  May I follow it.  Love me as I know You do.

Gregg